I didn’t want to fall, couldn’t move on and time will come to deponent; I loved you alone. I met you to hurt me, for the momentous smile that goes fade with the distance from you, appealing that I’m incomplete without you. That was you; I thought, could heal me and would fix my heart, one that collapsed, by the end of first love’s hangover. You were the reason, I could move on from my ex, I got that smile back, lost in the shadow of all those sudden change. Strained up life with confused lifestyle, I passed last two years, forgetting all the aims and visions keeping aside.
My Agonizing Past
I had no idea where life was heading towards, no track was there and even no alacrity left to achieve my past goals and then you got introduced to my life. In Just first five minutes talk, you impressed my mind and you kept me busy in my thoughts whole day and night. Taking lesson from past I made up my mind to keep distance, not to rerun the agonizing phase. So sure I was, about what that happened, you came close to heart, found your space, replaced my past, healed my wounds and you left in my mind as the only option. You were uninformed, my only worry, rest was alright!
I Loved You
Since you were already in, I had to think about it. Again I thought, can’t repeat those mistakes that I made in the past, “this time bit careful, will let you take your time, I will wait for your eyes to speak” I had completely accepted you in my heart. I stopped living in the past; you became the destination, again my life walked on a new track but only for a small phase, could be called as being under the weather. Quiver of my tricks went empty in making you laugh. So selfish I was, my smile stashed between your lips. So careful, I was stepping up, still couldn’t make this out. I failed again, here too. Your silence killed me, was a kind of poisonous sting. I thought to end this up earlier and I ended it.
I Loved You Again
Credit earners are my friends, who brought me out of this bottomless gulfed depression. I wished to move on, but no! I was not supposed to; I had to fall in your love, one more time, this time unwanted. Physically far but mentally close, my life was nothing like I chose. Keeping you in front of my eyes, doing whatever I do; got addicted of your giggling snap. Crying inside deadly with hollow mind and heart glutted with tears, Broken into millions, I pleaded god, just throw you out of my mind, please help me!
Still waiting for god’s stick, no help received, yield the point, I kneel here, can’t forget you, until the god bless me with my alter ego. I love and I hate you, like a bad I addiction, you worsen my life. But hey! You are innocent like you were, it was my fault, unaware of your insights I introspected into your life. So if the cap fits me, I have to wear it. Still lost on an unknown road; knocking at strange doors; hitting head everywhere, can’t tolerate. I don’t want to be in love again.